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Thursday, February 18, 1999 Senator Carson W. Enterprise claims that God visited him and told him that he would become his personal servant. The senator claims that God told him to collect $5 million for worthy causes. | |
 The Senate will discuss impeachment proceedings against Senator Enterprise tomorrow |
"Yes he appeared to me as I was sleeping" Senator Enterprise told reporters yesterday. "He instructed me to collect a large sum of money for the unfortunates. So I ask all you kind people to give me as much as you can find in your good hearts to give. It doesn't have to be $1000, you can give only, for example $200. A small sacrifice indeed." Dr.X doubts the senator's statements. "He is a liar" the intellectual doctor points out. "Any member of Congress is known to be a liar. This is an undisputed fact." Senator Enterprise counters "I have seen the light and reformed my ways." The senator told reporters that he planned to become an evangelist so that he could reach more of God's children. His infomercial plea for funds can be seen on late night television already. "My plan is to reach as many poor souls and save them from eternal torment." When asked about the three young women that were seen to accompany him to a hotel room late last night, the senator replied: "Bambi, Tina, and Darlene are my new servants to God's cause. They assisted me in spreading the Word." "Rubbish!" replied the revered Dr.X.
-- contributed by chief correspondent Stan Patchley |
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