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Tuesday, February 23, 1999
The wicked troll, Sabu, is responsible for over 200 bridge disasters to date. Authorities know it, but do not possess the evidence to indict the slippery troll.
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"Prepostorous!"
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"It is all a lie!" says Sabu in a press statement. "It is a vicious rumour being perpetrated by Trollist liars!" Police chief Lon O'Brien denies all claims of being a Trollist. "I have many troll friends, including Ghubo, my pal from the police academy." says Chief O'Brien.
Sabu has hired lawyer Johnny Cochran to sue for slander and libel. "My client will not be treated this way" says Cochran. "We are sick of the racial stereotypes that good, hard-working trolls have to deal with everyday. When that great Troll leader, Bundo Mhaputi stood before the masses and gave his now famous speech 'I have a vision...', we should have learned to live as brothers. But instead innocent trolls like Sabu are being persecuted. It's not right I tell you!"
Dr.X believes that Sabu is a liar. "I have pictures proving that he is the responsible party!" Dr.X tells the press yesterday. "He gives Trolls everywhere a bad name. I'm sick of him dragging Trollism into this, as it's not a Trollist issue! This is about justice!"
-- contributed by the eminent Dr.X
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